cycle of life

we had church at the "zoo" today. actually, it was the livestock research center. coincidentally, it's also the worst smelling place on the island. being the center's 50th anniversary, it was bustling with families and small children who came to enjoy the animal smells and icecream. after waving flies away for about an hour, church ended and the bbq started. menu? ostrich. the very animal that haunts the memory of my experience the last time we visited, besides the monkey that almost ripped my friend's ear off.

it was my first time to try ostrich meat. i couldn't get past the mental image of the bird itself, much less the sour flavor and beef-jerkey texture. i ate two bites- which took a total of ten minutes to chew, then handed the rest of my sandwich to my dad, who thought it was beef and enjoyed it. the bbq sauce an american girl had made and brought made the food worth eating, and dad was lucky enough to get a promise of a recipe from her.

they had turkeys there. i had no idea- for the past 6 Thanksgivings that we've been here, that there were turkeys so close. since locals rarely take a part in Thanksgiving celebrations with us, it can be safely assumed that we are in little danger of being found out if we steal a turkey for the next one. the thought crossed my mind. what else are turkeys made for, anyway? we are just a tool in helping them fulfill their life's destiny. not to mention they taste good with gravy and mashed potatoes.

i wonder what the next Thanksgiving will be like. maybe i will celebrate with the people i'll live with in Taipei, or perhaps come home, since i'd have more time to come back without the stress of HAVING to be in class all the time or missing major grade-affecting assignments. i would be happy if i never see the inside of a university-degree program class again. people always tell me that student life is so easy, and working life is much harder. i've worked before, and i've always preferred working to studying. sitting at a desk and spending all the time on my own brain instead of working with people? not my cup of tea, which in other people's opinions, seems to be half-brewed. i get annoyed with that. i am almost twenty-five years old. i know what i'm doing. i don't want to make loads of money (although it wouldn't hurt), i don't want to be in a high-ranking postition (that would hurt), i want to find something i can do and enjoy doing it. i know way too many people who love their job and the people they work with than to think i should take the first thing handed me or merely settle for a salary.

most people are not in that idealistic situation, and for some it is their own fault for not trying. because they COULD do it, but the risk is more than they can emotionally or financially deal with. or they think they could just do something because they enjoy it, not taking the time to develop the actual, meticulous skills necessary for the trade. and that is their fault. but just since they have a real salary to support their misery does not mean one should listen to their petty advice.

personal theory: look for people who you want to end up like. and take THEIR advice.

all others, the miserable ones that assume misery is an unescapable fact of life will only be able to advise in the ways that lead to where they are in life. do you want to end up like them?

i think there's always another option. the number of jobless people is lowering because of the falling economy (at least in current times). bums and hippies are usually so by choice. the people without any options are the ones who refuse to look for options. the ones who look and never find anything are the ones who refuse to SEE. the ones who see and still don't do anything are incompetent and lazy (stupid).


maybe success depends on one's definition of success. maybe some people are just better about taking whatever they do or happens and making it into something valuable.

new year

*edit*

quote of the year:

"The irony of commitment is that it’s deeply liberating – in work, in play, in love. The act frees you from the tyranny of your internal critic, from the fear that likes to dress itself up and parade around as rational hesitation. To commit is to remove your head as the barrier to your life."
~ Anne Morriss, The way I see it #76


i am currently parked on the couch watching Phineas and Ferb with Benj. it's great. even though it is the third time through the movie.

so most people like to write resolutions. i'm not into the resolution thing. so i made a to-do list in its stead. not really high priority stuff, but definitely more enriching of daily life if i do them.

- improve Chinese (not an option, it is a must)
- learn Chinese calligraphy.
- buy a surfboard.
- learn to skateboard.
- listen to the Beatles.

i also decided that i want to be a bartender. it's a cool thought, at least. that's been on my mind for a while. maybe i should just start playing around with things for fun. or maybe i'll just stick with foods, it's way cheaper.

pizza is done. dinner is therefore ready. :)